0
Personal Self Travel

What I Learned Abroad And Why You Should Solo Travel

May 20, 2017

After a period of a lot of beauty and impressions its always time for introspection, integration and moving forward again with clarity and a fresh dosis of new energy and inspiration that I would like to share with you! What an amazing journey it has been. It might be cliche but it is true what they say about traveling for a longer period of time.Travel is an eye opening, perspective and rewarding gift. It helped me prioritize my life, and really figure out what is important to me. It brought me closer to my essence and purpose in life. Also to have spend this time with an amazing person and lover by my side, who taught me to be more fully in the present moment, sharing nothing but joy along the way, I am very grateful. Yes, sometimes people travel in a hope to find themselves, others because they want to experience freedom and different cultures, and others just because they can or for work. Either way it will always bring something.

Along the way I experienced that kindness is a universal language. No matter where we are. It is one of the universal ways to make a human connection. Life IS about the journey. The goal or view at the end is but one moment, but the journey will be made of many. I found that staying humble and to respect our planet and treat it better is so important, as we live in a society that is always so obsessed with instant gratification and instant succes. Its time to start thinking more in a collective and uplifting way. Its reassuring to see that a lot of people are already aware of this. Nature puts you in perspective, and gets you out of that individual state of mind for a moment.

As I travelled I could somehow detach myself from the identites I made up for myself in the past, a breakdown of ego lets say, and a new sense of awareness. (coming from a conditioned mind) All the sudden fear for the future was replaced by a sense of trust that it will be allright. Sometimes being out of your comfortzone, experiencing some form of discomfort or being in a different environment can strengthen that. My real passion and intuition was always with me, it had never left me.

Creating Boundries & Traveling Solo

After 8 months of traveling together, I decided to travel solo. Traveling solo teaches you about boundries. If anything, my biggest challenge in life is to establish healthy boundries. Since my childhood, being in between a divorce I learned to divide my attention very quicky. If children at a young age are experience severe amounts of stress, they learn how to divert and be “there” to have a little bit of peace at their core. I learned to perfectly tune in to other people, and trying to feel what others need so I could be prepared. But I forgot what my needs were to the point where I lost complete track of who I really was. Traveling can certainly get you back to who you once were. Why? Because solo travel encourages you to make your own decisions from moment to moment. Hmm shall I eat pasta tonight? Or go to that lovely fish place down the road? Shall I go for a mountain trip or stay at the beach today? Shall I hang out with this person, or do I not feel like it? This may seem like a lot of choices but you get really good at it. It is an amazing feeling of freedom to feel that you can do exactly what YOU need. Its very important that we get our needs met.  Need however sounds like a dirty word, because it implies lack. However, we as humans HAVE certain needs. Other wise we couldn’t be happy or succesfull in life. It is about honestly being upfront about your needs where the process of creating boundries begins. Im learing to create healthy boundries step by being honest with myself and being conciously present with myself by constantly checking in with myself, and what I feel from moment to moment. It is okay to say no sometimes. I noticed by doing this you get more grip on your energy, as I would feel drained a lot in the past. It still happends sometimes though, and you know what? Thats okay. Even though I am very social, I am an intovert. I need time to be alone. I need time to recharge my batteries. Traveling is a great challenge to give yourself that space. You are being challenged to constantly feel what you need in the moment. And if someone crosses your boundry because you allow it, or you did something because someone else wanted you to and you didn’t do it for yourself, you will feel that later. It will catch up with you. Thats why I want to say that having healthy boundries is so important, it is a form of selflove. It is a form of keeping your personal power. And having healthy boundries does not mean that you can’t let anyone in, that is the opposite, and that only creates more misery and more walls. There is a way to be open and still maintain boundries. But in order to do that you have to really listen to your gut, and constantly check in with yourself. Do I want this right know? Do I want to listen to this conversation? Is it draining me? Do I get energy from this? If yes? Then great, if not, then make sure you remove yourself from the situation as soon as possible by simply saying NO. Man this has been an heck of a challenge for me, as I am someone who rather put my own needs aside, and often experience some form of pressure of not taking in enough space while on the other hand I can sometimes step over other people’s boundries too. Its not uncommon, everyone with weak boudries does this in the beginning. But its also a process. You can only learn when someone either stepped over your boundry or visa versa, and when you become aware of it, is where this begins to change. When you have weak boundries, you allow others to quickly cross yours, but in return you also have the tendancy to step over other people’s boundries. Why? Because if you don’t feel or know where those boundries are, if you don’t have a filter, you don’t know where the line draws in the sand. It is impossible to stay centered having no boundries. At first I thought it was a good thing, I said to myself. Well I don’t have a filter, and boundries, I am open to everyone and everything, isn’t that beautiful? Yes it is, but not when you also allow the negative energy to penetrate your energy field. Since I am extremely empathic and sensitive to other peoples energies  I was forced to work on this area out of a necessity.  But then again, every situation is always an oppertunity to learn, and to try again. That is what life does, it always gives you second changes. It always gives you space to grow.

When you stretch your comfort zone, you grow as a person. For instance, two years ago my application for a job at a specific company got declined,  I wasn’t too happy about it. I was resisting the change for some time, until I realized that this was a great place for growth.  Now, two years later I ended up traveling the most beautiful places, I have learned new skills, gained more confidence and I know that I’m ready for the next situation like this in the future. That declination actually brought me closer to what I really want, and that is to have my own bussiness and persue that dream.  I just had to make that choice. Something that you were once afraid of or felt impossible to do is now part of your skillset. Your comfort zone has grown in the process. If there is any lesson learned it is that stepping out of your comfortzone is the best thing to do. The funny thing is, life always gives you new chances,  and before you know it you are where you wanted to be.

You owe yourself the love you so freely give to other people.

    Leave a Reply